The Little House Built on Lies
by RDawgtheDinosaur
Summary: Not your typical love story. Read as two gay lovers finally get together, but end up causing all sorts of drama in the process!
1. Chapter 1: Secret Love

Chapter one: Secret Love

Once upon a time in a little shack lived the Ingalls family. Laura waited patiently by the door while Ma made dinner. A gust of dirt blew by and a tall man stepped off his buckboard. Laura's eyes brightened with excitement. She ran out and gave Almanzo a big kiss. "I've been waiting for you all day!" she said. "Ma said dinner is almost ready!"

"I can't wait! I've been looking forward to this all week!" (Almanzo had to visit his sister, Eliza Jane, for a week and left Laura with her parents.)

As they walked in the house, Amlanzo's heart skipped a beat; he was nervous. "Dinner's ready!" Ma called to everyone and all the Ingalls sat down. Almanzo's face grew red. He kept pushing down his feelings, but he couldn't contain himself. His heart fell into his stomach and his foot kept shaking.

"What's wrong Manly?" Laura asked.

"I just need some air," and Almanzo leaped outside. He fast walked all the way to his buckboard. "What am I doing?!" Almanzo asked himself. "I love Laura! How can I be in love with her Pa!?" He hit his head against a fence nearby." Oh Mr. Ingalls I wish I could tell you how I feel! But you're married and I'm with your daughter! But I can't contain myself when I'm around you. I'm in such a pickle!"

"Right you are." Almanzo jumped and turned sharply. He then realized how idiotic it was to talk to himself out loud. Pa stood there in the moonlight with a smug look. Almanzo knew he had heard everything. "You certainly are in a pickle."

"Sir, I can explain-"but Almanzo was cut short by a wave of Pa's hand.

"I've seen the way you look at me Monzo. You can't even look me in the eyes without doing some nervous tick" Almanzo nervously looked away. "See you did it again!"

"So you already knew?" Almanzo asked. Pa nodded his head. Almanzo turned around afraid of what Pa would say next.

"To be honest I've thought about it a lot. I mean you couldn't hide this forever. "Almanzo's head rose up. "I knew it would come and I would have to have a reaction. But the question is how do _I_ feel about _YOU_?" Almanzo turned his head slightly.

"And?" He asked.

"And turn and face me boy. "Almanzo turned around sheepishly. His arms tightly by his sides and his head down afraid to meet Pa's. "Look Manly I have a family. You're dating my daughter! What would they say to you right now? I have responsibilities to obtain." Almanzo looked away as if everything he was saying was a knife in the heart. "I can't just drop everything and fulfill your fantasies…" Almanzo, on the verge of tears, felt Pa's hands on his shoulders. With a great force Pa and Almanzo were suddenly lip to lip, kissing in the moonlight. Almanzo, realizing what was happening, relaxed and kissed Pa back. Pa released and whispered in Almanzo's ear "That doesn't mean I won't fulfill mine." And Almanzo, for the first time, looked into Pa's eyes and gave a great big smile.

"Oh sir-"

"Please, call me Charles"

"Oh Charles! What about your wife and children?" Almanzo grew sadden "and poor Laura!" Almanzo turned and looked at the happy family eating supper. "What have I done?"

"No Almanzo. I wanted to kiss you and I want to be with you." Almanzo grew hopeful and looked up at him. Their eyes met and they knew they could not hide their feelings toward each other.

"We are terrible people," Almanzo said.

"No we are secret lovers who happen to be in a relationship with people from the same family." Almanzo giggled and realized how long they have been gone.

"We should go back"

"Yes we can plan the future later."

They both awkwardly walked into the tiny home. "Boy! You guys were gone a long time." Ma looked into Pa's eyes but his mind was somewhere else. "Anyway, did you get everything sorted out? Whatever was wrong?"

"Umm…Man…stuff," Almanzo said clumsily. Everyone at the table looked away to avoid Almanzo's embarrassment.

"Ah-em! Welp! How was Eliza Jane?" Laura made an obvious attempt to change the subject.

"She's fine. She tells me she's seeing someone."

"Really!? Who?" Almanzo felt Pa's foot under the table. He grew red and sweaty.

"Uh…Uh…" Pa's foot made its way further and further up his leg until…BANG! Almanzo jumped and hit the table. Everyone stopped and stared at him. Tension in the room was very high. For Almonzo connected if Pa pieced together his obvious love for him then Laura and the rest could too. Almanzo could not play it cool like Pa could. Manly, all sweaty and nervous, blurted out the first name that popped into his head to move the conversation along. "Pearly Day!" Everyone dropped their forks (even Pa) and looked at him. Together they all exclaimed:

"HER BROTHER?!" Almanzo, realizing his error, felt more sweat roll off of him. But, looking around he could tell he diverted the attention away from Pa and Almanzo's obvious love affair. He realized if he didn't want to face Laura's family with the awkward conversation that might eventually happen, he would have to distract them until the end of dinner.

"Uh…yes!" That's why I didn't want to tell you. _" I'm a bad bad person_ , Almanzo thought. Everyone was in udder shock. _It's working,_ he thought. "It's totally gross and I had no idea how to react." While everyone was looking at each other Almanzo gave a big wink to Pa and Pa gave a big smile back.

"What are you going to do?" Asked Laura. Almanzo took a deep breath and said:

"I don't know." While looking straight at pa he said "I just don't know."

The evening went by fast and hectic. Lots of questions and stolen glances. At the end Pa and Almanzo were standing by Manly's buckboard.

"You know I didn't like you when we first met," said Pa, "but now I can't get away from you. I know what we have to do. Come back here early morning before sunrise." Almanzo nodded just as Laura came out.

"Bye manly!" She kissed him but his eyes were directed at Pa. "I'll see you tomorrow for the big day! I simply can't wait!" She smiled, but all Almanzo could manage was a simple nod. He had forgotten all about how he and Laura were to get married tomorrow. The whole evening revolved around the lie Almanzo told. He felt even more ashamed of himself.

"Bye Beth!" and with that he rode off.

The next morning Pa and Manly met and discussed until…

"You ready?" Asked Pa.

"Ready." Said Monzo. Pa got his things and kissed his sleeping wife for the last time. He left a note by her side and was out in a flash.

"Let's go!" Pa and Almanzo got in Manly's buckboard and rode off into the sunrise hand in hand.

When Ma awoke to find her husband missing she saw the not. Already knowing what it said she picked it up and read:

Dear beloved family,

I'm sorry to leave you like this but I have to. For Almanzo and I are in love. Ma has a stable job and will be the best mother. Treat her well. I'm sorry Caroline and Laura. I know you knew this was coming. Dinner was…well something. Just so you know Almanzo made up that stuff about Pearly Day and Eliza Jane. He's such a goof. Just now we love you and wouldn't have done this if we didn't have to. But we don't want to cheat on Ma or Laura so we must leave. I will send money to help support you, but just know we cannot come back. We have traveled o a place we will not be judged.

With love,

Almanzo Wilder and Charles Ingalls


	2. Chapter 2: The Road Away From Judgment

Chapter 2: The Road Away From Judgment

Manly kept the horses at a fast trot. He wanted to get to the paradise free of judgment as soon as possible. Pa sat next to him in the buckboard; hip to hip. Pa's hand lay on Manzo's thigh. He couldn't believe they were finally doing it. Leaving Laura was the best decision he had ever made. He was with his true love now. Every mile they traveled created more space between him and the lie he was living for the past year. "What do you think Laura will say when she reads the note?" Manly asked

"She probably knew it all along," Pa replied, "But she did not want to admit it." Manzo nodded in agreement.

"I am sorry I had to hurt her," Manzo said. Pa rubbed Manzo's shoulders and said:

"You did what you had to do son. She will understand eventually. Give it time." Manzo, again, nodded in agreement. Pa kept his hand on Manzo's shoulders giving him a light massage. The feeling of Pa's fingers against Manzo's neck made Manly sigh with pleasure. At this point he decided to forget about Walnut Grove. Pa was his future now.

They rode for many miles, and then Manzo stopped the horses at a creek for some water. That's when Manzo realized he hadn't bathed in a long time. After working in the fields back home from dawn to dusk harvesting for three weeks he forgot to cleanse himself. Manzo stripped down to his long john underwear and walked into the creek. He scrubbed his long blonde locks and ran his fingers through the golden strands. That's when he caught Pa staring at him out of the corner of his eye, but Manzo did not feel embarrassed like he had with Laura. He felt peaceful and comfortable. Pa decided to take a swim in the creek as well. Manly and Pa frolicked in the sparkling water, performing beautiful swan dives and at the end sat hand in hand watching the sun set on their first full day together. Pa's curly locks blowing in the wind and Manzo's blonde hair flowed gracefully behind him. "This reminds me of the dates Laura and I used to go on…"

"Shhhh!" Pa put his finger to Manly's lips. "I thought we were not discussing that life anymore."

"I know," said Manzo, "I was just thinking about what Laura might be doing right when she reads the note. I wonder if she will really be that surprised."

"Forget about her," Pa answered. "Let's just get. It. On!"

…Meanwhile back at the shack…

Ma put down the letter and shook her head. The husband she was married to for all these years is secretly gay. _Oh how humiliating this will be when people around town find out_ , she thought _. Not even that he's gay, but the fact he's gay with_ Almanzo _of all men. It is just so bizarre._ _Not that I'm surprised._ A shiver went down Ma's spine. _I would never fall for a man like Almanzo. Never!_ She knew Laura needed to read the letter as well, but Ma decided to let her sleep in. _Let her dream about her wedding one last time._ But suddenly she heard Laura yawn along with footsteps on the ladder. Laura then stood in the kitchen smiling and rosy.

"Good morning Ma! Today is the day I _finally_ get married!" Ma didn't say anything. "Where is Pa?" Laura asked.

 _Oh no!_ Ma thought, _I have to tell her._ She cursed Pa and Manzo under her breath for putting her in this situation. But Laura continued to talk about a wedding that would never come. "Oh Ma I am so excited! The cake you made will be so beautiful and Nellie and Percival are coming in from Boston, and Manzo must have finished the house, and our wedding night is going to be amazzzzziiiiinggggg!" Laura winked at Ma and Ma almost threw up in her mouth.

"Laura," Ma interrupted, "Pa and Almanzo are not coming back." Laura looked confused and said:

"What do you mean? Where did they go?!" It's my wedding day!"

"I know Laura," Ma said, "but Pa and Manzo are in love and they went to the place they will not be judged." Laura was speechless, and Ma showed her the letter. Laura read it carefully then looked up at Ma.

"This can't be true," Laura cried. While tears spilled down her face, "Manzo loved me! He called me Beth!"

"What's all the hubbub?" Albert jumped down from the loft and landed next to Ma and Laura. Laura was crying so hard she could not answer, so Ma answered for her.

"Manly and Pa ran away together…because they are in love." Albert was actually happy about this. _With Manly out of the way Laura and I can finally be together,_ thought Albert _, And Pa couldn't judge! We aren't "really" brother and sister after all. Pa is just as annoying as Manzo_. _He always tries to be good on the outside but he's an ANIMAL!_ Albert ran to get his father's old shotgun from the cellar. Laura was still crying at the kitchen table, and Ma stood silent next to her.

"Come on! Let's shoot Almanzo dead!" Laura's face turned from sadness to anger as she snatched the gun from Albert and nodded with agreement. _Almanzo Wilder has messed with my heart too many times and now he's going to pay_ , thought Laura. Albert ran to get the buckboard ready and Laura and Ma got bread, cakes and pies for the road. Who knows how long they would be gone. Ma got Carrie and Grace as Albert pulled out front. They all loaded up the supplies and soon they were off. The whole family knew exactly where the two lovers were headed. The road away from judgment was common and Manzo and Pa were only ahead a few miles. The sun was rising so they had a long way to go before sunset. Revenge awaited.

…Meanwhile back at lover's creek…

Manzo had just woken up as the sun was rising. At first he was startled because he did not know where he was, but soon saw Pa's curly afro by his side and knew he was exactly where he was supposed to be. Manzo watched Pa sleep for a while. Suddenly, Almanzo kissed Pa on the nose to wake him up. His eyes slowly fluttered open and a smile fell across his face. They were both still in their long johns after swimming in the creek the previous evening (amongst doing other activities). The both got up and went to the buckboard to pick out a fresh outfit for another exciting day. Manzo picked his usual tan outfit with black knee high boots that went perfectly with his strong calf muscles and golden locks. Pa watched as Manzo go dressed and said: "That tan outfit was the one that made me fall in love with you. It is just too hot to handle." Almanzo blushed. Pa had never spoken of the time he first started to fall for him, but it was sweet. Pa got dressed as well and Manzo helped Pa into the buckboard. Almanzo held the reigns in one hand and Pa's in the other excited for day two on their road from judgment.

After about an hour Manzo began to hear giggling from the side of the road. "Do you hear that?" Almanzo asked. Pa nodded. The giggling continued to get louder until suddenly…BAM! Pearly Day and Eliza Jane popped out of the grass. Pearly Day was carrying his sister on his back and she was giggling. Lipstick marks all over Pearly Day's face, Manly was shocked. Finally, he stumbled out: "So it is true! You two ARE lovers?!"

"Of course!" Eliza Jane answered, "That's why we left Walnut Grove and began the journey to No Judgment." Pa shrugged and turned to Manzo.

"Well I guess we can't judge you two. Jump in."Manzo was angry Pa invited them even if they were his siblings; he wanted to be alone with Pa. He saw the buckboard useful for intimate moments. They rode the road a little longer until they heard another strange voice. They all looked behind them to see a gust of dirt as a wagon appeared full speed. It became visible that a shotgun was pointed straight at them.

"Die Manly!" The voice was coming from Laura.

Pa and Manzo looked at each other and said "Let's roll!" The wagon chase was about to begin.


	3. Chapter 3: Lovers Quarrel

Chapter 3: Lovers Quarrel

Pa and Almanzo raced forward on the path and made quick twists and turns to get the others off their trail. They made a sharp left on a road that lead to St. Louis. Albert's wagon crew soon lost sight of them but still kept shooting forward in a fit of rage. They then realized they lost the lover's wagon. "I'LL GET YOU ALMANZO IF IT'S THE LAST THING I DO!" Albert screamed across the forest. Ma soon was gaining consciousness on what was actually happening. Her cloud of hatred fogged her acting rationally and she grabbed the shotgun from Albert. "Ma Wha-"

"Hush," she said, "I know you're angry son, but we can't kill them. It's illegal. It's wrong. It's crazy." Ma looked down as if now letting the thought of her husband never coming back sink in.

"But Ma what they are doing is illegal, wrong and crazy."

"No, my child. It's going to take a while to get used to, and I'm not saying it won't hurt…but did you see the way Pa looked at Almanzo? He never looked at me like that…" Suddenly Laura burst into tears realizing Manly never looked at her like that either. "Oh Laura I'm sorry. He did love you and Pa loved us. It's just…he found happiness and it's where they will not be judged. We need to find our happiness too. It'll take time but I know we will be better off in the end." Albert looked at his weeping step-sister and knew he already found his happiness. Laura looked up at Ma and with a slight smile said:

"Oh Ma why do you have to be so wise all the time?" Both giggled and Ma gave a big embrace to her daughter.

"Am I the only one thinking clearly here? Pa LEFT US!" Albert got up and looked straight at Ma "He's an ANIMAL!"

"Albert I know you're mad-"

"NO! Ma I was never going to tell you this but-" Albert swallowed hard and closed his eyes, "Pa has done this before…I mean…with another man." Laura and Ma looked at Albert with confusion. "I caught him in the shed with…Jonathan." GASP

"Wh-when was this?" Ma asked

"A couple months ago…maybe a year." Ma looked away processing the new information.

"It doesn't matter now," Ma got up and headed off to the river, "I just need to be alone now. I'm sorry kids."

"Argh! How can he do this to us!? And Almanzo! I can never forgive him for hurting you!" Albert looked at Laura. Her eyes were filled with the soul of a broken girl. Albert sat down next to her and held her hand. "I'm sorry Laura. I promise no more surprises." Laura looked up at him as though nothing could surprise her anymore. "Well…maybe one more surprise." Albert leaned in and kissed Laura. Shocked at first, surprisingly, later Laura kissed him back. A feeling overwhelmed her. Something she never felt with Manly. It was like the world stopped moving and Almanzo was a distant memory. Had she really loved Albert all this time? Laura looked into Albert's eyes and realized her happiness was in front of her the whole time.

"Pa can be with Almanzo as long as I get to be with you," Laura said. Suddenly a frown came across her face. "Albert if the town sees us as siblings and we want to be together…then don't we have to go on the road to no judgment?" Albert's heart broke.

"No-no! It can't be! WAIT! Pa never actually signed any papers or anything. I can double check with Ma, but I don't think officially we are siblings! It should be all good!"

"Oh Ma, if only she could find someone to help her forget about Pa." Laura had a sinking feeling. "Wait, what is Ma going to say to all this?"

"Honestly Laura, with what she's going through, I don't think she'll care." Albert grabbed Laura's hands "Plus we're happy together and we can move out and get our dream jobs. We can move on from this mess and get our happy ending!" Laura and Albert shared a big smile.

…Back on the Pa and Almanzo Wagon…

"I think we lost them!" Pa said. "Let's rest in a while okay?"

"NO!" Eliza Jane screamed, "That's were Harv Miller is!"

"Oh no we're back on this?" Pearly Day said, "He never loved you!" Eliza Jane looked astonished and gave a HUMPH as she walked away. Pa and Almanzo gave each other a smile and a silent "wow". While Eliza Jane and Pearly Day were bickering, Pa and Almanzo snuck off.

"Are you really okay with this incest thing?" Pa asked.

"I mean not fully but I can't judge. Look what we're doing."

"Yes Manzo look who I'm doing. With his sexy blonde curls-" Just as manzo and Pa were about to kiss…

"THAT'S IT!" Eliza Jane screeched as Pa and Manso held their ears to her annoying voice. "Look Pearly! Harv Miller DID have a thing for me! I know it!"

"Oh please, he would rather bang a difibulator," Eliza Jane was ready to explode when-

"That's it! This is why brothers and sisters don't date!"

"Well amongst other reasons," Pa gave a gesture to Almanzo that said 'Can you believe this?' and Manzo gave a nod back.

"I'm going back to the bird man! He knew how to use those lips for more than just bird calls!" And with that Eliza Jane stormed off with Pearly Day not that far behind her, trying to persuade her to stay.

"Welllllllll, now we're alone FINALLY," Almanzo slyly said to Pa.

"Indeed we are," Pa grabbed Manzo's waist. While looking deep into each other's eyes they shared a kiss so intense and passionate it could rock the west coast.

"Well, well, well," a voice came from the road. A man jumped off his buckboard, tall and burly. "Looks like you found a new lover, Charles."

"Jonathan…" Pa said "what are you doing here?"

"I just had to drop something off for work and then I saw you two. So…are you two a thing? On your way to no judgment right?"

"Um, yeah," Pa grabbed Manzo's hand. "I love him," Something in Pa's eyes and voice was different when he looked at Jonathan. Almanzo just stood there confused.

"Wha-"

"We sure had fun in the old days. Didn't we Charles?" Jonathan had a sneaky smile on his face.

"We sure did a lot of…experiments back in the ol' shed," both shared an awkward laugh as Almanzo whipped his eyes back and forth to both men, looking for an explanation.

"Look Charles we had fun, but it was just experiments. I thought maybe I would like this and I did, but there was no long term relationship there like what it seems you have here with this young boy."

"You don't have to tell me twice," there was almost pain in Pa's voice as he spoke these words.

"Don't give me that look Charles! I learned a lot from you, but I just want fun! I don't want to drop everything and move to no judgment country. Later I'll find a nice woman and settle down in Walnut Grove, but right now I just want to have my fun with men and women. We've been through this Charles. I don't want to hurt you anymore. I see that look in your eyes. I wish you and Almanzo happiness when you reach your destination." Something was not sincere in Jonathan's words and Charles could tell. _Trying to rip apart relationships is more accurate to what you want to do_ , Charles thought. _But something about you… I can't seem to let go._ And with that Pa checked out that ass one last time as Jonathan tipped his hat and rode off. Pa sighed loudly.

"Okay, what the heckles in Mr. Olsen's restaurant is going on here?!" Almanzo screamed. "I saw that look in your eyes Charles! What is this!?" Pa sighed again.

"In the past Jonathan and I used to work in the shed. We were all hot and sweaty and kept bumping into each other. I liked it so much but I felt wrong. I didn't realize why I liked it so much. The thought of me being gay I couldn't handle it. But I would never get that exited with Ma. One day I fell on top of him and kissed him in the heat of the moment. Things soon escalated and we had our first gay love affair that night." Pa looked off into the distance as if fondly remembering that day. Almanzo hung on every word Pa was saying. "That night was so magical and the moon was so bright. We made it almost a daily thing to meet in the shed. I think that's when the family started to question my sexuality. But we were such passionate lovers." Pa suddenly grew dim and looked down. "But it was not the same for Jonathan. He saw it as just experimentation. One day he just called it off. Wanted to 'have fun' with other men and women. Things were dark for a time. I was heartbroken. I had already made plans to run away with him to no judgment country, but he left. Shortly after I met you." Pa grew a smile and looked up at Almanzo, but the smile was not returned. Almanzo pushed his lips together and only anger was on his face. "Manly you changed my life! You helped me learn to love again! More than ever! You're my whole life now. C'mon don't look at me like that. This was before I met you! Manly?"

"Don't call me that, _Mr. Ingalls_ ," Manzo stormed off with Pa right behind him. "Stop following me!" Irrational Almanzo turned around in a fit and said: "How could you not tell me you had sex with another man!? HOW!?"  
"Almanzo please this was before I met you! And let me tell you Jonathan doesn't even _compare_ to you! I love _YOU_ now! Come on Manzo!"

"I saw the way you looked at him! You could write a _novel_ with the lines in between! You still love him! How can I ever expect you to get over your first love?"

"Almanzo stop acting like a child. I love you now and that's final!" While the two lovers continued to quarrel suddenly there was a loud BANG! A gunshot was heard in the direction Eliza Jane and Pearly Day had left. Both Charles and Almanzo ran into the direction.

"How are we ever supposed to get to no judgment country now!?" Almanzo screamed.

"Shut up stupid you're supposed to keep the land from judgment quiet so the police don't find it!" Pa said.

"Oh so now I'm stupid!? Maybe we shouldn't even go!" The two lovers bickered the whole time while running to see if it was indeed Eliza Jane or Pearly Day who shot the gun. But once here arrived at the area both stopped talking. In udder shock they stood in silence. It was neither sibling who was holding the gun.

It was Jonathan.


	4. Chapter 4: This Love is Real

Chapter 4: This Love is Real

Pa and Almanzo did not know what to do, so they just stood there with their mouths open.

"Don't move a muscle," Jonathan commanded, "or the blonde gets it." Jonathan's gun was pointed straight at Manzo's heart. Charles needed to prove to Manzo that he was committed to the relationship, and what better way to prove his love than to save Manly's precious life.

Pa decided to talk their way out first. "Now Jonathan just calm down. Let's talk about this."

"NO CHARLES! I DID MY WAITING," Pa realized Jonathan's gun was still smoking. He quickly looked for Pearly Day and Eliza Jane, but there was no sign of them.

"What did you do with Pearly Day and Eliza Jane?" Pa demanded.

"They were in my way. So I discarded them."

"Did you kill them?" Pa asked

"You will find out soon enough my handsome one," Jonathan answered. "When I take you to my secret lair and torture you!"

"Oh and what are you going to do to me? Turn me into a frog!?" Pa laughed sarcastically.

"Yeah, how did you know?" Pa just stared at Jonathan. This guy was crazier than he originally thought. Even though he and Jonathan did lock lips in the past, Charles heart completely belonged to Almanzo James Wilder. Charles turned t Almanzo and said:

"Here's the plan," Pa spent five minutes explaining the intricate plan to Almanzo, which involved a complicated trap. While Pa explained the plan Jonathan just stood there with the gun while checking out Charles. Jonathan was almost being hypnotized by those dark brown curls and sexy thighs. Suddenly….

BAM! Pa and ALmanzo were gone! Jonathan did a 360 searching for the lovers. That's when he saw them run into the general store. Jonathan sprinted after them with the gun in hand. He ran into the store and said, "Where did the sexy men go?" The cashier just stared back at him. Jonathan sighed and screamed, "The blonde and brunette! Where did they go!?"

"Oh _those_ sexy men," the cashier replied, "they went into the storage room". Jonathan raced back into the storage room and stopped dead in his tracks. Manzo and Pa stood hip to hip holding hand guns.

"Say goodbye Jonathan". And with that Pa pulled the trigger and shot Jonathan. Even Almanzo was surprised by Pa's sudden act of violence, but the bullet wisped right past Jonathan's ear and hit the wall behind him.

"Nice shot," Almanzo sneered. Then Almanzo grabbed the gun and shot Jonathan in the arm. Jonathan fell to the floor sobbing for mercy. Manzo and Pa jumped right over Jonathan and ran out the door of the general store. Pa helped Manzo into the buckboard, and they began to drive off, but Almanzo said, "Wait Pearly Day and Eliza! Where the horse balls are they!?" Pa was in the drivers seat focused on the road, but he replied, "I don't know but do we really have to find them? They are so annoying anyway." Manly stared back at Pa and said, "I can't believe you would even think about leaving my flesh and blood behind!"

"Just kidding," Pa chuckled, but Manly was not amused. Pa kissed him on the forehead and then lifted Manzo's chin with his index finger and said, "I will find them if it means that much to you." Manzo's heart began to beat fast. Pa's love was still real for him. They held hand in hand as they drove around said Louis looking for the other pair of lovers.

*Back on Laura and Albert's wagon*

The sun was beginning to set as Laura was getting ready to go to sleep in the back of the wagon. She slipped into her nightgown and laid down on a bed of soft blankets. She could hear Albert's footsteps outside the wagon as he prepared the horses for sleep. She could hear him whisper: "Goodnight Sandy, goodnight Barnum." His gentleness made Laura even more in love with him. Laura was just beginning to fall asleep, but suddenly Albert peeped his head into the wagon and whispered, "Laura are you awake?"

"I am now," Laura replied softly. Her heart began to beat even faster.

"Grab a blanket and follow me," Albert whispered."I want to show you something." Laura grabbed her wool blanket and stepped out of the wagon. The sky was lit by beautiful stars. Albert and Laura walked hand in hand into the grassy meadow. Albert snatched the blanket from Laura and laid it gently on the grass. Albert and Laura laid down the blanket and stared up at the stars in silence. Laura squeezed Albert's hand tightly. Suddenly Albert rolled on his side and whispered into Laura's ear. "You are my everything Laura Ingalls, and when your ready to bang, I'm ready to band…HARD!" Laura's eyes went wide. Manly barley got to first base with Laura, and Albert was already on his way to a home run. She turned back to Albert and was about to give a smooth and sexy whisper back, but Ma began calling for them.

"Ohhhhhhh children! Dearest children!" Ma called, "Where are my babies?" Albert sat up and with a huge frown across his face said, "Ma! You ruined the moment." Ma came walking up to them in the darkness. She held something in her hand. In the moonlight they could tell she was frowning.

"Recognize this?" She said to Laura. A tear almost seeped from her eye. Laura stared at the piece of fabric in her hand. Then suddenly she gasped. It was a piece of Manly's flannel nightgown. The one he wore on one of their anniversaries. Laura took the piece of cloth from Ma and began to squeeze it in her fist. Blood began to rush to her face as her anger began to build. All those lies he told! All those times he said, "I love you Laura Ingalls", in that sweet idiotic country accent of his. All those times his hands, dirty from working in the field, ran through her long hair. And all those things he said in the meadow. The moment he kissed her forehead before she failed her teaching exam. The day he called her a little girl. Too many memories! Too much history with this dorky, perverted, old man. Laura stood up and threw the piece of cloth into the nearby pond with tears streaming down her face. That's when she saw a pair of Manly's long johns laying next to the pond, with one of Pa's flannel shirts. It took her a minute to put the pieces together. Suddenly Laura shouted, "Pa and Manly went skinny dipping!? Manly would never have done that with me!" Albert gasped and Ma stood there with her hand covering her mouth.

"Me neither," Ma replied.

"Same," Albert said. Ma and Laura's head turned to Albert stunned.

"Albert is there something you're not telling us!?" Laura asked.

Albert gulped, "Laura before Manly began to notice you as a woman…" Albert gulped again, and began to sweat. He started to pull the collar on his shirt, "Manly and I were having a fling." Laura blinked and said, "What sort of 'fling'?"

"A love affair, a love fest, a gay relationship! Whatever you want to call it!" Albert replied.

"Why didn't you tell me?" Laura started to sob. "I loved him."

"I did not want to hurt you Laura," Albert said. Tears began to pour down Albert's face. He walked up to Laura and tried to touch her face, but Laura slapped his hand away.

"You lied to me Albert! You said you love me, but you love Manly! I can still see it in your eyes, you're just like Pa!"

"Laura that was so long ago! I love you now!"

"Albert please! I can't take any more lies."

"I'M NOT LYING," Albert screamed.

"ENOUGH CHILDREN!" Ma bellowed. "Let's go kill those Hill Billy Bastards before somebody else does."

"You're back in Ma!?" Albert asked excitedly.

"Oh yes, and this time we are coming back with country asses or so help me…"

"C'mon!" Laura yelled, "We have no time to waste. Let's get them!" The three piled back into the wagon. Ma drove while Albert and Laura sat in the back, planning their revenge.

*Back on Almanzo and Pa's Buckboard*

Manly's eyes harrowed as they searched for Pearly Day and Eliza. The sun was hot on his face, and drops of sweat began to form under his tan shirt. He was concerned for his siblings. Manzo defiantly heard a gunshot before seeing Jonathan. _Could Jonathan really have been that crazy to commit murder?_ Almanzo sighed. He did not have a clue. Then again the way Jonathan stood there with his beard blowing in the wind, and the gun smoke billowing into the big, blue western sky, all made Manly sigh dreamily. Pa was right: Jonathan was smokin', and Manly wanted a piece of that hot country pie as soon as possible! However, Manly remembered how much effort and emotion it took to get Pa to finally notice him. With a man like Jonathan, it would at least be twice as long. Manly shook his head in despair. He was a lonely man caught between two irresistible men. He turned to Pa, about to confess his new found feelings about Jonathan, when he noticed all of Pa's beautiful features. His curly hair, stunning complexion, and silky-soft lips. Manly chuckled. Pa while sitting next to him on the buckboard asked, "What's so funny Manly?" Pa gave Manly a sweet smile, and put his hand on his shoulder. Manzo couldn't resist and he lunged at Pa To give him a big smooch. But Manly was too aggressive and Pa fell back off the buckboard and grasped the side with his hand.

"Manly what the h-!?" Pa screamed but he couldn't finish his sentence because his flailing body was spooking the horses. One horse reared and the other leaped and gallop out of control.

"The reins! The reins!" Pa screamed, but Manly was not able to reach them since they were dragging on the ground under the horses pounding hooves.

"I can't reach them!" Manly yelled back. The horses, without a driver, began to run off the road into a nearby meadow.

"Manly we need to jump off!" Pa screamed.

"It's too dangerous." Manly called back.

"We have to!" Pa begged. "I'm going."

"Pa noooooooo!" Pa let go of the side of the buckboard and tumbled to the ground. "Paaaa!" Manzo cried. Manly knew his only chance to survive was to jump. He had to summon all his courage and bravery and he finally jumped from the buckboard. The horses with the wagon continued to run into the sunset until they could not be seen anymore. Manly looked around for Pa, but he was nowhere to be seen. The buckboard tracks were visible so Manzo began to follow the trail. He called out Charles' name and eventually ended up running in circles. Suddenly Manly tripped over what appeared to be a large hole in the ground. "What the cinnamon chicken is this?" He said to himself. He cleared away some grass, and by using his brain for once, Almanzo came to a stunning conclusion. "There are stairs!" He yelled with excitement as he clapped his hands together. The hole was actually a secret passage. "Hello?" Manly bellowed into the hole. At first Manzo could only hear his own echo, but then, suddenly, a voice screeched:

"MANZO!" The screech was so shrill and annoying it could only be one person…Eliza Jane!

"Eliza!" Manly called back, "I'm coming for you!" Manly began his journey into the ground as he hurried his way down the stairs. As he continued he saw trails of blood covering the floor and walls. "What is this horrible place?" Manly thought to himself. Finally he reached the bottom of the stairs. At the bottom there was a large cavern with tunnels that led to other parts of the underground cave. But in the middle of the room was Eliza Jane locked in a cage screaming and begging for mercy. Manly ran up to the cage and yelled, "Eliza, are you okay?" Manly began to scratch hopelessly at the bars.

"Manly it's no use." Eliza screeched. Manzo covered his ears. Eliza's voice was truly as annoying as ever, but he had to listen to her in order to get out of this mess.

"How can I get you out?" He asked.

"The key," Eliza said, "you can find the key with-"

"Me," a voice bellowed. A shadow emerged from one of the tunnels. It was Jonathan. He was holding a key in his hand, swinging it back and forth, almost putting Almanzo in a trance. Manly quickly snapped out of it and said, "Give it to me!"

"Or what?" Jonathan snapped. "You're just a dumb blonde who can't do anything." Almanzo began to get angry. He knew he wasn't the smartest, but he also knew he wasn't the dumbest. Manly knew he would have to think like Pa in order to get out of the situation. Manzo tried to just snatch the key, but Jonathan was too fast. He began to sweat. He had no plan. He wasn't Pa. But he knew he had to act fast, and at this point he was only thinking of himself. "Well are you going to make a move pinhead?" Jonathan asked. Suddenly Manzo thought of a decent plan.

"Eliza, I need you to scream as loud as you possibly can."

"But Manly-"

"Just do it!" Eliza bent down and eyed Jonathan, and gave him a wink.

"What the hell is going on?" All of a sudden Eliza let out a scream so shrill and piercing it could have been heard around the world. Luckily Manzo remembered to cover his ears as Jonathan fell to the ground. Manly snatched the key out of Jonathan's hand and quickly unlocked Eliza's cage.

Eliza stopped screaming and said, "Manzo follow me! I know where the rest are." Manly and Eliza began to sprint out of the cavern through one of the tunnels that led deeper and deeper into the fortress. "Wait is Pa here too?" Manly asked

"Yes he came sliding down those stairs you came down." Pa must have fallen off the buckboard and right down the hole. It made sense why Manly saw no trace of him on the surface. The tunnel had a lot of twists and turns so Manly got a little dizzy.

"Eliza do you know where you are going?" Manly asked breathlessly.

"Not really," Eliza screeched, "but I know for a fact they went down this tunnel."

"We have to find them!" Manzo replied, "I need my Charles!" Manly thought of those dark shiny curls and strong jaw and muscular legs, all these things that drove Manly crazy.

"We will find them, don't worry." Eliza said. Almanzo was still a little thrown off by his siblings dating, but it's not like he could judge. "I see a light up ahead!" Manly's heart began to beat fast. He knew Pa was up there waiting for them. The two ran closer and closer to the light until they reached it. The light was coming from under a door that ended the tunnel. Eliza tried to open it but it was locked.

"Manly, what are we going to do? Our loves are behind this door!" Eliza cried. Almanzo felt around his pockets to see if he had anything to pick the lock. When he reached in he realized he still had the handgun that shot Jonathan. He totally forgot he could have used it earlier, but it's too late for that. Manly pulled out the gun and shot the lock.

"You had a gun this whole time?!" Eliza remarked.

"Shut up, I forgot okay?" Manly had a more important person on his mind. He kicked down the door and what he saw was astonishing. Charles and Pearly Day were both tied to chairs with gags in their mouths. The both had wounds all over their bodies. "Charles!" Manly cried as he ran to Pa to untie his ropes. Yet, Manly couldn't help but think he looked good in those ropes. But there was no time for that. When Manzo pulled off Pa's gag, he gave him a big kiss. Eliza untied Pearly Day and also locked lips.

"We have got to get out of here!" Pa shouted.

"Come on!" Manly said, "Follow me!" He led the squad toward the door, but suddenly Jonathan stepped into the doorway.

"Leaving so soon?" he asked.

"Get out of our way Jonathan," Manly pulled his gun out again. He pulled the trigger but the handgun was out of bullets. "No, no. no!" Manzo screamed.

"Yes, yes, yes" A voice answered. Suddenly…BAM! Harv Miller appeared in the doorway staring at the two sets of lovers.

"Harv Miller!?" Eliza screeched. Pearly began to scowl.

"I see you guys have made yourselves quite comfortable in my cavern."

"Why did you trap us?" Eliza asked, "I thought you loved me."

"Oh please I would rather bang a defibulator."

"You lied to the whole town about us being married and it humiliated me! I lost my wife and all my friends! Now you and your friends will pay! Jonathan, my partner in crime, get them!" Jonathan charged at Eliza and knocked her out cold. Pearly and Pa tried to fight back, but they had no strength. Jonathan was like a superhuman. Manly was the only able bodied person in the room. He was tired, but he knew he had to fight for his life. Jonathan quickly punched Manzo in the stomach and he fell to the ground. The last thing Manly saw was Harv and Jonathan's laughing face and he drifted into an unconscious state.

"Dumb ass Eliza Jane," Almanzo whispered.

Then everything went black.


	5. Chapter 5: Shots Fired

Chapter 5: Shots Fired

Everyone in the room was paralyzed with fear. Pa was quickly losing consciousness because of the blood loss and so was Pearly Day. Manly was the only one capable of taking on Harv Miller and Jonathan. "I have no beef with you Almanzo, step aside and let me kill Eliza." Almanzo looked at his unconscious sister with a debating look, but soon shook his head.

"No she's my sister and you hurt Charles. You _do_ have beef with me." Almanzo said as he tried to stand up.

"So be it," Harv pulled out a gun and nudged it to the direction of Pa. Jonathan ran and tied up Pa and Pearly Day again. Eliza was still unconscious.

"Whoa, whoa, let's fight like men, throw that weapon away." Almanzo persuaded.

"No, Manly," Charles vice was weak, "Don't do this-"

"Shut up," Jonathan slapped Pa. "By the way, Harv is a much better lover," he whispered. "He takes charge and does what needs to be done."

"Oh, but I haven't told you the best part, "Jonathan leaned in extra close. "We both Fu**ed your son." Charles' eyes went wide and he looked up at Jonathan who had a sly smile. Charles, with what little strength, spit into Jonathan's eyes. Jonathan just laughed and went to stand next to Harv.

Harv and Almanzo were still fighting on whether or not they should use guns or not. "ALRIGHT! Almanzo I'm going to enjoy watching you suffer." Harv threw the gun and jumped on Almanzo. He punched him and Almanzo threw as best he could. Jonathan just watched as the two rolled around trying to strangle each other. Rolling, punching, punching, rolling. "Jonathan, you idiot, come help me!" But there was no response. Just a…BANG!

Almanzo threw Harv off of him. Breathing heavily he finally got enough energy to look up. While they were fighting, Eliza had woken up and grabbed the gun that was thrown. She untied Pearly and Pa who then captured Jonathan. Finally, Eliza, with luck, shot Harv while he was on top of Almanzo. "NOOOOOOOOOO!" Jonathan let out a piercing scream and Pa and Almanzo couldn't help but feel bad for him.

"Eliza, you…you, you saved my life," Almanzo gave her a big hug and couldn't help but think, _I knew I saved you for a reason._ Almanzo immediately ran to Pa and started to cry, "Oh Charles, I love you, I love you, I'm never leaving you again." He couldn't stop kissing him. All his thoughts about Jonathan disappeared. Eliza Jane and Pearly Day were also caught in love.

"Disgusting", Jonathan said under his breath.

"Let's get the heck out of here!" It took some time, but with twists and turns the group got out of the cave. "What now?" Pa asked. The saw the old horses eating grass trying to get free from their reins. The all fixed up the buckboard and got in.

"Alright, no stopping, let's get to no judgment land!"

*Back on Laura and Albert*

"Ma are you really going to kill Pa and Almanzo?" Laura was getting second thoughts.

"Laura I am not turning this wagon around, _again_." Albert was looking out to the side thinking about the men who loved him.

"Albert, what's wrong?" Laura touched his shoulder. Albert grabbed her hand.

"Oh Laura you have to understand I didn't fully know what was going on." He began to cry. "I just have one more confession." Laura took a deep breath, but eventually just said, "okay". "Almanzo wasn't the only one who had a relationship with me…Jonathan and Harv Miller did too." Ma held the reins and brought the horses to a stop.

"WHAT!? My baby!" Ma held Albert in her arms.

"Oh Ma! Pa always told me to help him in the shed, but when he wasn't there, Harv, Jonathan or Manly were there." He started to cry a little hard. "It wasn't my fault! You have to understand!"

"Of course we understand," Laura said.

"So this is _more_ Charles' fault," Ma said, "I swear, I'm going to-" but something had caught Ma's eye. "What on Earth is that?" She pointed to a staircase leading down into a cave. As Ma went closer she could hear someone yelling for help. "Oh my goodness! Someone is down there!" She jumped down and Laura and Albert trailed behind. Laura grabbed Albert's hand.

"Albert just know I will never use you like they did," She smiled at him and he smiled back. They kissed so passionately they almost forgot about Ma.

"I know Laura…hey Ma! Wait up!" She was following the person's voice until she got to a door.

"Hello? I'm here to help!" She opened the door, but she wish she hadn't

"Caroline?"

"Jonathan and-" She screamed and backed up. "Is that Harv!? Is he…dead?"

"I'm afraid so…Eliza, with her crew of _savages_ , killed him."

"Was…was Almanzo and um…Charles on that…crew?"

"Unfortunately, yes love," Caroline snapped out of shock and looked at Jonathan with anger. "You both can go to hell, good-bye."

"Caroline, wait!" She couldn't resist him. "I know you're hurt because of Charles, but why take it out on me?"

"I don't give a damn about Charles, YOU and Harv touched my son!" Jonathan looked surprised and then saw Albert and Laura.

"Oh my… that was so long ago… It wasn't my idea I promise you I'm a changed man. Harv had some sort of control over me, I'm sure you know what that's like," Jonathan looked up at her sinisterly, "but I never wanted to hurt anyone…truly Albert I'm sorry…I was foolish and young."

"Stop." Albert waved his hand. "No amount of apologizing will make what you did right, but if all of them really could kill someone, then we need all the help we can get."

"Oh Albert, thank you, thank you! And there is one thing we all share: our hatred for Charles and Almanzo." Everyone in the room grew an evil smile. Ma went up to Jonathan to untie him. He whispered to her, "Caroline, you're an amazing woman." She blushed. "No really, most women would just stay home, but you took action!" After he was untied he grabbed Caroline's wrists. "Everything I did, _everything_ , was to get over you."

"Johna-" she was cut off by his manly kiss.

"I have always loved you Caroline," he said.

"Jonathan, we were together in high school, that was so long ago-" he kissed her again. It had been so long since she had the touch of a man, she couldn't help but slightly swoon. "no-no" she said weakly as he kissed her neck.

Albert and Laura were outside the door enjoying being alone. "We can take it slow if you want," Laura said, but Albert kissed Laura hard. He wanted to forget about his past.

Inside the door things quickly escalated. Both naked, Ma felt so wrong, but it made it so right.

Twenty minutes later Ma and Jonathan came out. Albert and Laura quickly stopped making out. Both pairs of couples were too busy trying to get undisheveled they didn't even notice they were all clearly doing naughty things. "Eh-em…let's uh…get going." Ma led the way as Jonathan grabbed Harv's body. "What are you-?"  
"He deserves a proper burial," Ma could tell he was being sincere and let him though. As everyone walked in silence, Laura notices another door. Curiosity got the best of her and she opened it as Jonathan screamed, "NO!" Laura stood in shock and turned to Jonathan. Dead on the ground was Nellie. He knew he had to think fast if he didn't want to lose Ma, "Stupid Nellie," He thought, "why did you have to run your mouth and say you were going to tell people about the lair!?" Jonathan held his head low. "It was Almanzo and his crew of bandits…" he said, "They are out of control." Jonathan fake teared up and Ma touched his shoulder. He grabbed her body too as they all went to the surface. "Now let's give these people a proper burial and kill those responsible!"

*Back on Almanzo and Charles*

Pa kept the horses running to get as far away from that lair as possible. Hours went by until….

~Welcome to Toronto~

"Guys wake up! We're here! We're finally here!" Everyone cheered as they pulled up to the cheapest motel. The clerk said, "Welcome to Toronto- the land of no judgment. Surrounded by miles of forest and an impenetrable password." Almanzo and the others looked puzzled as they slept though all of that. Charles winked at them and said: "I love bananas". Everyone giggled. "Two rooms, please."

"Of course," and the clerk gave them the keys. "$0.50 a night, try not to make too much of a mess," he said as he winked at them.

"Okay everyone, we've had one crazy night…now let's go to bed." Eliza and Pearly Day went into their room and Pa and Almanzo went into thiers.

Charles just wanted to go to bed, but Almanzo came up being him on the bed and started to massage his shoulders. "No Almanzo I…that's nice…"Almanzo started to kiss and massage him until all that was left was the bedspring noise.

The next morning Charles and Almanzo were planning to go search for a house and a job in Toronto. "After that near death experience, Manly I'm sorry I yelled at you. You're my everything…" Almanzo put his finger to Pa's mouth.

"Honey, you did all your apologizing last night when you rocked my world." They then kissed passionately. "Alright Charles, as you look for a house, I'm going to explore this new found land."

"Alright bootylicious." Almanzo wondered throughout the developing town and saw all the interesting people, all here to escape judgment. He felt at home. He then caught a glimpse of someone. A man so beautiful and majestic he stopped dead in his tracks. Why was _he_ here? He thought to himself. For the moment he saw him it was Pa was old news. He wanted nothing more than to be with him. Of course, being Almanzo, he ran right up to him.

"Uh...he-hu-hy-herlo," he stumbled out.

"Uh…? Me?" he said. Almanzo nodded violently. She looked him up and down and couldn't help but feel attracted to him, but he had to keep his cool. "Okay, okay, what's your name?"

"Well…uh…Man…Manly…no…Almanzo."

"Almanzo?" okay weirdo," he smiled at him and held out his hand.

"Maros, Maros Elshin." Manly just stared at him and weakly shook his hand. "I'll see you around hot stuff, maybe you can get a whole sentence out next time," he winked at Manly and slapped his butt as he left. Almanzo just nervously giggled and walked to a place where he could be alone.

"What am I going to do?", he thought, "I've been though to much with Pa! And I love him! But there's so much of this world I don't know! But for gosh sakes a ran away with _Charles,_ but still…he reminds me of Laura, a better Laura." He started to think of her and sighed.

"Hey!" Almanzo jumped thinking it was Pa reading his thoughts. When he turned he found it was his new crush. "Hey, 'manly', or whatever, my friends totally adore you and think we should go out. Meet me at the café at eight," and with that he was gone into the town. Almanzo knew he couldn't refuse.

At 7:45 Almanzo sat at the table in the motel biting his nails. "What's wrong Manzo?" Pa came up behind him and rubbed his shoulders. Almanzo, full of tension, jumped up and stumbled back.

"Uh…It's…ah…nothing, I just…I just need some air…don't worry." Pa looked at him with one brow up as Almanzo ran out. This was extremely suspicious because Almazno had said that exact thing to Laura before he ran away with Pa.

At the café, Almanzo busted in panting, then tried to collect himself as he sat down. Maros came in fabulous and was obviously the boss of the town. He sat down not even looking at Manzo. Everyone was staring at them.

"Hello Maros," Almanzo mumbled.

"Oh, look who can finally talk," He said sarcastically.

"I gotta ask...why are you here in no judgment land?" Maros finally made eye contact with him. "And why are you like, a celebrity here?" He looked away again and Almanzo followed his gaze. He saw in the window Charles, glaring at them.


	6. Chapter 6: Judgment

Chapter 6: Judgment

Jonathan, unfortunately couldn't make it up all the stairs with two dead bodies and decided against the burial because it would take too long. Harv, was trying his best to let them know he was still alive. Jonathan went close to Harv and whispered, "I'm so sorry Harv…but I love Caroline more than anyone. I know you will understand." While Jonathan and Ma left the cave hand in hand, leaving Harv to rot, Harv couldn't help but feel slightly offended. Harv coughed up some blood and felt the wound from the bullet. Luckily, somehow it hit no vital organs. He ripped off his shirt from his sweating body and made a bandage. Out of nowhere, Doc Baker came running to Harv's rescue out of one of the shadows.

"Harv! Harv!" Doc Baker screamed. Harv was still unable to speak with his mouth full of blood. "Don't worry Harv, I will save you." Baker sat him up and smacked his back to get him to cough up all the blood.

"What the hell are you doing?" Harv asked angrily.

"Saving your life."

"Just please get this bullet out of me." The doc inspected Harv's side.

"Well, I need to operate. Follow me to my office."

"Your office? Down here?"

"Oh yes, Harv I've been watching you for longer than you know." Harv was getting dizzy from all the pain and became very desperate. He followed Doc to the right tunnel of the cave and Baker unlocked a door at the end. "I will fix you up more than you know."

*Back on Laura and Albert*

Jonathan made himself comfortable in the back of the wagon and Ma cuddled up next to him. Ma's warm body kept him warm during the cold night. Laura and Albert were up front driving the horses. No Judgment land was not far, Ma could feel it.

Jonathan was happy to be back with Ma, but was very sad he could not give Harv a proper burial. Suddenly Ma started to slide her foot up Jonathan's leg. She felt so comfortable with him, like they were teenagers again. Ma winked at him and Jonathan licked his lips. But before anything could happen, Albert popped his head in.

"Hey what's going on in here?"

"uhh…man…stuff…" Ma rolled her eyes at Jonathan, but couldn't help but laugh.

"Anyway, look! We've made it to No Judgment Land!" Ma opened the wagon curtains and saw the Welcome to Toronto sign. She smiled, they were about to get their revenge. Jonathan peered out as well. His heart started to beat faster with the thought of seeing Charles again. He looked at Ma and everything else didn't seem as important.

As Albert carried the luggage into the hotel, Laura couldn't help but dazzle at his bulging muscles. The hotel room had two beds, perfect for two couples.

"Let's split up and look for these bastards." Jonathan said, "Me and Caroline will search all the stores and hotels. Laura and Albert check all the restaurants and cafés."

"Got it." Albert said as he threw the luggage on the ground. Ma and Jonathan left in a hurry, leaving Laura and Albert alone. "Well, we better get looking."

"We could…or we could do something else." Laura looked at him seductively. Albert returned to look and was quite eager to join her in bed.

*Back with Almanzo and Pa*

Pa walked away from the window and entered the café. His eyes were locked on Manly's. Almanzo began to sweat profusely. _Maybe he won't think this is a date?_ Almanzo thought. But Maros was way too beautiful for anyone not to be jealous. Pa was heading right for him so Manly sprang up and backed away. Maros looked at him like he was crazy. He had to cause a scene. He had to cause a distraction. So, Almanzo began to sing as loud and as proud as he could. The whole café was very confused. Maros and Pa just stared at him in shock. Almanzo continued to panic-sing because that was the only thing he could think of. As he sang everyone began to murmur about what was happening. Manzo kept looking back and forth at Maros and back at Pa. Which one was he going to choose? Take a chance, or stay true? As he ran out of stuff to sing his voice began to become weak until…suddenly: _Whooooossshhhh_

The floorboards opened up as Almanzo fell through the hole.

"Almanzo!" Maros and Pa screamed, but as soon as they jumped to him, the floorboards closed back up.

*Back with Harv Miller and Doc Baker*

Doc pulled off his surgeon mask and said, "You're all good my man." Harv woke up and looked thankfully into Doc Baker's eyes.

"Why did you do this? Can you-" but Doc put a finger to his mouth.

"Shhhhh…I'll explain everything don't worry." And Doc pulled up a chair to sit on. "A long time ago I realized I was not getting paid nearly as much as a doctor should. So, I heard about this 'black market' and how much they were making. I came across this random cave near a perfect secluded town. I thought this would be the perfect place to start a sort of 'black market hospital'. I also run my own personal experiments on whoever needs the cash to test new methods. When you and Jonathan came down here I _loved_ to just watch you too do your thang," Baker was cut off by his own smile. "Anyway, I had no idea you guys were such thugs. I mean you actually m _urdered_ people. But, if I told the cops they would find out about my black marker, plus, I kinda grew to like you two." They both stared into each other's eyes and smiled. "Oh and I forgot to mention the best part. That little secluded town is where I got the most business. .."

THUD! "What was that?" Harv asked.

"Why don't we go see," Baker winked at Harv. "You probably didn't see my press that button, I've got my eye on someone else too. I've been keeping up with all the drama that has been happening." They ran until they got to a small opening where Almanzo lay on the ground.

"You got him!?" Harv screamed.

"Oh yes, my evil plan is finally coming together."

" _Your_ evil plan? What?"

"Harv I wished you would have just brought him here, but then you had to go and get shot. I think it's time the master take control." Harv felt a little degraded and said nothing.

"Almanzo!" Pa's voice could be heard above the trap door. "Almanzo, I will find you! I will always find you!" The cavern fell silent again as Harv and Doc Baker stared at Manzo's unconscious body.

"Is he dead?" Harv asked. Doc Baker went over to check his pulse.

"Nope, not yet. Come, help me take him to a 'hospital room'." Harv and Baker dragged his body to the room and set him on a table. Doc Baker stared at his body while Harv looked back and forth at both of them wanting so badly Doc Baker's attention.

*Back with Pa and Maros*

Pa was scratching hopelessly at the trap door. Maros rolled his eyes and kicked Pa in the side. "Stop old man that won't get him back."

"You don't know anything about him!" Pa screamed.

"I would have gotten to know him a lot better if you didn't meddle in."

"We have got to find him! _Now_!" Suddenly, Jonathan, Albert, Laura and Ma busted into the café, hoping to get some lunch, but found something else instead. Ma's eyes met Pa's, Pa looked away sheepishly but Ma glared him down.

"If you're wondering where Almanzo is he's not here."

"Good riddance," said Ma. Laura looked annoyed.

"No!" Laura, with even the thought of seeing Manly, made all her old feelings rush back. "I still love him," She whispered under her breath.

"What!?" Albert looked horrified, "But you love me. You love me! You just had sex with me, how can you say that?"

"Enough!" Pa bellowed, "Almanzo was kidnapped through this trap door, and I need to find him."

"Eh-em," Everyone turned around to face Maros.

"And who are you?" Laura asked.

"I'm Maros, apparently Almanzo's side ho." Laura was about to say how she couldn't even believe Manly got another lover, but Maros put a finger to her mouth. "We don't have a lot of time, I think I know where he is." Maros strutted out of the café while everyone else fell in line. They all walked straight to the side of the schoolhouse where under some bushes, there was another hole. Jonathan knew exactly where it led.

"Wait this is exactly like the entrance to Harv's and mine secret lair?" Jonathan grew sad of the thought of Harv. Ma went over to comfort him and saw the look on Pa's face. She lifted Jonathan's head and kissed him passionately. Pa rolled his eyes.

"If you think that's going to make me jealous Caroline, it won't. I'm in love with Almanzo." Caroline ignored him and kept kissing Jonathan. Laura gave a disgusting look at her father.

"Come _on_ you slow pokes!" Maros hurried the group as they all moved into the hole. Albert came up behind Laura to try to convince her to stay with him. As the group walked further into the cave they saw a whole other section labeled "Hospital". Everyone was very confused. Maros led them to the operating room and opened the door, positive Doc Baker was in there. When the door opened everyone was horrified. Eliza Jane, Pearly Day, and Almanzo were all in test tubes, like human experiments. Ma fainted but Maros acted like this happens all the time.

Out of one of the back doors Harv Miller and Doc Baker came out. "Well, it's about time you guys got here," Doc said, "More test subjects," he whispered to Harv.

"Doc Baker!?" Everyone screamed.

"Harv!? You're alive!?" Jonathan exclaimed.

"What did you do to Manzo?!" Pa demanded. He tried to run up and grab Doc by the collar, but Harv held him back.

"Calm down old man."

"Is he dead!?"

Doc gave a debating look, but eventally said, "No, no, he's just unconscious. For right _now_." Doc gave a chuckle while Pa gave him the look of death. "Man catching you guys is too easy. All I have to do is set a few trap doors and bada bing bada boom, everyone is here together, how sweet."

"You will not get away with this!" Pa screamed.

"Oh but I think I have." And Doc and Harv gave a menacing laugh as they backed up into the back door. Maros,also, gave a small chuckle. Everyone turned to him.

"You were in on this?" Laura asked accusingly.

"Oh, yeah I'm one of his black market nurses. That's why I knew how to get down here." Maros quickly backed out of the room and locked the door. Leaving Jonathan, Almanzo, Laura, Charles and Caroline stuck inside; it didn't look good for anyone on that side of the door.


	7. Chapter 7: An Epic Conclusion

Chapter 7: An Epic Conclusion

Maria laughed and walked out of the room where Pa, Manzo, and the others were frozen. They were all still alive, at least for a little while, and were in utter shock. How could that woman wield such sorcery? Little did they know Maros was from the future. That was why he was in the land of no judgment and that is why everyone there was in awe of him.

When Maros came into the other room with Jonathan and Harv, she could sense the tension. "Look, just give me the money so I can leave. And give me about $1000 more, this drama is NOT what I asked for." Harv had hired Maros because he knew he was the only one who could (and wanted) to seduce Almanzo and lead him to the exact spot where the trap door was. But he did not expect all this nonsense.

"okay, okay, you did the job." Harv pulled out a bundle of cash as Maros finally smiled. Maros knew that in the future this money would make him a fortune.

"Look whatever is going on here is beyond weird. If I were you, I'd just run away and start new," Maros said.

"yeah, yeah just go before you have to see any more," Harv said. Maros gave a peace sign and ran out of the cave as fast as he could. Doc Baker came out of another door and said, "I've finally done it! The perfect gun." It had three bullets and whoever was shot by in, instantly died. Harv tried to take the gun, but Doc seemed unsure about giving it to him. "Why should he get the thrill of the kill? I mean I'm the one who built this cave and _he_ 's the one who took it over with that dumbass Jonathan," Doc thought. Suddenly Doc had a change of heart and pointed the gun at Harv.

"The world should be cleansed from the sins all of you people have done."

*Meanwhile*

A few minutes after Maros left the ice began to melt. After all, the ice ray he had was still in beta. The first to thaw was Pa. Pa looked around the room at his frozen friends, family and new enemies. "It all started out so simple. How did it get so out of control?" Pa thought. Then he looked at Manzo and felt his heart flutter. Everything seemed so simple with him. He looked at Ma and absorbed the sadnedd that things would never be the same. The second to thaw was Ma. Pa and Ma stared at each other. For the first time in a _long_ time, they were "alone". All Pa could manage was, "Caroline." Ma put a finger to his lips.

"Charles, I know."With just those three words they understood each other. They would always love each other, just never in the same way. Charles will always be sorry for what he did.

Both began to chip at the other frozen people until they heard a BANG!

"what in the-?" Almanzo said. The other door Maros and Jonathan went out suddenly BURST open. Standing in the doorway was a very large Doc Baker, breathing heavily. Everyone stared at him, wondering who was shot. Looking behind him, Laura spotted Harv Miller on the ground, dead, and gasped. Suddenly, a rage-filled Jonathan jumped on Doc and tried his best to get the gun away from him.

"How could you have killed him!?" Jonathan screamed.

"You all have caused too many sins!" Doc screamed back. Suddenly Doc Baker pointed the gun at Ma. Everyone gasped and backed up. Jonathan froze, he still loved her. He looked at her deeply, her face was full of fear. Jonathan knew what he had to do and gave a nod to Pa. Doc was on a murder "cleansing" spree and wasn't going to stop anytime soon. Doc pulled the trigger. Ma screamed. Only, Ma wasn't the one on the ground. It was Jonathan. He took the bullet for her and it was as if he finally felt free from his wrongdoings. Ma looked down at him and acknowledged his sacrifice. They were even. Doc backed away with one death bullet left. He viciously looked around the room trying to figure out who to kill next. Pa put his hands up and said, "whoa, whoa, Doc c'mon give me the gun."

Then an unbelievably shrill voice said, "Yeah Doc what the heck!?" Everyone in the room covered their eyes. Doc, almost instinctively shot the bullet right into Eliza's heart. Everyone gasped and Pearly Day screamed as loud as he could. He instantly ran around in circles then, like a ninja, jumped on top of Doc screaming wildly. Doc hit him with the gun as he shouted, "you're one of the worst ones! Getting it on with _your sister_!?" Laura and Albert looked guiltily at each other, but soon realized they were not _blood_ siblings.

No one dared interfere in the fight because it was a fight to the death. What made the bullets so deadly was that the entire inside of the gun was full of poison. Doc soon realized this and stuck he gun in Pearly Day's mouth. Trying to get it out Pearly's tongue went wild. Soon he felt the poison coursing through his veins. Doc relaxed and back off. Pearly, with what little strength he had knew he had to avenge his lover/sister's death. He swiped the gun out of Doc's hand and shoved it in his mouth. Everyone became uncomfortable, but knew this was the only chance they had to save themselves. Doc flailed around, but knew the poison had already entered him. Pearly, at last, slumped to the floor Doc began to accept his fate. He, too, felt like all his sins were being lifted.

Finally, the only ones left were Pa, Ma, Laura, Albert and Almanzo. The original, the way it started. Pa found the button to release the lockdown doors and one by one they each dragged a body to the surface and buried it. They prayed for each one, especially Eliza and Pearly. Almanzo stared at his sisters grave. As annoying as she was, he was going to miss her shrieking voice. Charles came up behind him and grabbed his shoulder. "Hey, at least this is all behind us. We're safe now" Everyone nodded. Laura grabbed Albert's hand. "I think we can all agree this world is a little better without those murderous horrible people. I mean they were even worse than us!" Everyone gave a slight smile and nodded again. "Let's go on and live out happily ever afters." Ma stared off to the distance and realized she was going to be all alone. Pa went over to hug her. He knew he was not going to see her for a long time. He whispered, "Caroline." But she put a finger to his lips once again.

"Charles, I know." They both laughed and hugged once more.

""I'll always love you," He whispered as he was hugging her.

"You know I will too," she said back to him.

Charles went over to hug his children, say sorry, and goodbye. Almanzo, being the big goof that he is, mumbled some stuff to Laura. Laura rolled her eyes and squeezed Albert's hand even tighter. She smiled at him and realized she made the right choice.

Almanzo and Charles went to live in the land of no judgment , soon after Charles proposed to Almanzo.

Laura became a teacher in the land of no judgment and her and Albert lived their lives out together. They had three children.

Ma soon healed over her lost love and moved to a nearby city near the land of no judgment. She learned quickly she was a very desired woman and gained a lot of lovers. She soon found her one true love that helped her raise Grace and the others.

They all lived happily ever after

THE END


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